Cut & Color, Holler!

What do you think?

I am mysterious now.

The Feud

OMFG Check it out you can play Family Feud online!!!!

Please Help!

Friends and Family,

I just received a disturbing press release today that prompts me to send out a desperate plea to all of you.

Currently, a contest is being held amongst several NASCAR drivers, celebrities, professional athletes and many others to design the commemorative ticket for the 50th Running of the Daytona 500 in 2008.

Several individuals were invited to submit artwork. Some of the invitees include: Daytona 500 winners Kevin Harvick and Mario Andretti, TV host Kelly Ripa, action sport legend Tony Hawk, NFL standout Michael Strahan, drivers Dale Earnhardt, Jr. and Jimmie Johnson, NASCAR Team owner Rick Hendrick, Crew Chief Chad Knaus and NASCAR driver Kurt Busch.

The rules and materials provided to these people were very specific, and very simple. They were sent a blank piece of paper, and markers; red, blue, black and yellow. They were asked to use the materials to create a design for the commemorative ticket and submit it back to our PR department.

This is a big deal for all of us at Daytona, but apparently, some people think it’s just a big joke, because that’s what they turned in as their artwork. Most of the entrants just drew stick figures, but some of them even took the liberty of using computer graphics, Microsoft word art, hospitalized children, and in some cases, professional artists to create artwork in their name, and submit it under their name.

Clearly, these were not the rules.

One of the entrants who submitted a sub-par entry is currently winning the contest, only because he has a huge fan base in the NASCAR world, not because he has any artistic talent, or even cared a drop about the contest.

I have taken it upon myself to do everything in my power to prevent this contest from being related to popularity rather than quality of the entry. I also am very adamant about whether or not the entry follows the rules.

Please visit the polling site http://www.daytona500.com/handler.cfm/form,poll/cat_id,44231 and see for yourself.

Some of the entries are really good. I am impressed by those who actually tried rather than those who picked up a marker and drew 4 lines, or even worse, made someone ELSE draw it for them.

Vote now, vote often.

But most importantly, vote for those who are deserving of the win.

Thank you.



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Thank You, Readers

Thank you friends, family and family of friends who responded in my time of need.

I was afraid I was writing this blog for no reason.

You really came through for me, kid.




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No One Reads My Blog.

That's it.

That's all I got.


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Joey Fatone was Robbed!

I have been rooting for Joey all season on Dancing with the Stars, and last night, my dreams were CRUSHED.

Some fruity speed-skater beat out the boy-band SUPERSTAR for the coveted mirrorball trophy.

Actually, I thought Apolo kicked major A$$ in the competition as well (his breakdance was amazing), so, I suppose there just aren’t as many *NSYNC fans in the world as I thought.

It is now time to take my Joey Fatone bobblehead down from it’s perch on the TV stand, where it has stood proudly for the past 13 weeks.

Joey, I think you did an awesome job. You still rock my world.

Now, I suppose you’ll have time to come sing the National Anthem at the Pepsi 400?


A girl can dream, can’t she?

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Busch League Football

Last night was one of the most ghetto experiences my life.

Robbie and I attended an AIFL game. That’s right, A-I-FL. Not arena football, no no. these guys aren’t good enough for arena football.

This is the American INDOOR Football League. Never heard of it? Welcome to Daytona.

The Daytona Beach Thunder played the Columbus Lions in a mini-grid iron battle of the century. Actually, I’ve already forgotten about it, so it’s probably not that epic.

To give you a taste of the caliber of this league, I will give you a short synopsis of our football experience.

We arrived to a packed house (and by packed, I mean about 15% capacity). Our seats were in a nosebleed section, and also taken by a couple of lads we didn’t really want to mess with, so we found our own seats. The first half of the game seemed like it went on for an eternity. There were 4 quarters in the game, but it felt like about 9 quarters. After the time would expire, the teams would just continue playing for some reason, with 0 time on the clock. This confused me greatly.

Apparently this “extended period” rule works the same for half time, since the entertainment lasted a good 5 minutes past the halftime clock had expired. So the players just stood around and waited for the “Lightning Dancers” to finish their little number.

Our halftime entertainment consisted of a field-goal kicking contest for a chance to win an Ipod, then what appeared to be a Christian Inspirational Ghetto Dance group, followed by a gang fight, center field. Then a couple of guys got up on pedestals and fought American Gladiator style, then the fans threw little footballs on the field for prizes, then the lightning dancers shot some t-shirts into the crowd (at which time expired) and they still had to do their actual half-time dance. All of which somehow had to magically fit into 15 minutes.

So when the game finally “resumed,” the players sortof sauntered onto the field, without helmets and like, TALKED to each other. Then there appeared to be some confusion among the players and officials. They were all just standing around looking for someone or something. This went on for about 30-50 seconds before I just yelled, “What is going ON down there!!?!”

Then, the call came over the PA, “Will the chain crew please report to the field. Chain Crew, please report to the field immediately.”

In spite of the fact that halftime ran about 5 minutes long, the chain crew STILL couldn’t find a way to get back to the field on time.

“Man, at least lemme finish my nachos. Damn!”


That was about the last straw before we left early in the 2nd half.


At least the tickets were free.



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Happy Birthday Mr. T!

Cultural icon and all-around badass Mr. T turns 55 today.

If you pass him in the hallway, be sure to tell him, “Happy Birthday, Fool.”



In unrelated news, my apartment stinks.

A while ago, we made the mistake of cooking an Uncle Ben’s box of wild rice with “garlic” in the title. I have learned that this is a mistake. My house has had a disgusting lingering smell of garlic now for a WEEK AND A HALF.

I’ve tried everything. Candles…. Cleaning EVERY surface in the kitchen… Air fresheners, deoderizers… carpet deodorizer with the vacuum cleaner… opening all the windows for several days..

I am at a loss. Short of burning the place down and starting from scratch, I am just totally defeated by this smell.

I don’t want a stinky house anymore.

Someone please help me. What can I do to get this horrible smell out of my house!!!?!???!???!!!!!!???



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Tomorrow is NASCAR Day!

** MEDIA ADVISORY **


NASCAR Day Celebration at DAYTONA USA

Who: Daytona International Speedway President Robin Braig along with Daytona Beach Mayor Glenn Ritchey, Volusia County Co-Chair Joie Alexander and other City and County VIPs

What: Special announcement, music, entertainment and a hot dog roast

When: Friday, May 18, beginning at 11:45 a.m.

Where: In front of DAYTONA USA, the “Official Attraction of NASCAR”

Why: To help commemorate the fourth-annual celebration of NASCAR Day

Note: The event is open to the public who have made a donation to purchase a NASCAR Day pin. To obtain a NASCAR Day pin, make your $5 donation at the DAYTONA USA Box Office. There is a $1 donation for the hot dog roast.

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Networking Scam - Cambridge Who's Who

I just got a letter in the mail from Cambridge Who’s Who, offering me inclusion in their Cambridge Who’s Who Among Executive and Professional Women “Honors Edition” registry.

Immediately, I saw a red flag, since the letter was completely vague, and sent to my work address. So I looked it up, and sure enough, more scam articles popped up than legit websites. Apparently, this is just some scam created to get you to pay huge amounts of money in a bogus “networking” organization.

If you get this letter, don’t respond to it. That’s how they get people to sign up, by playing on our egos. I was flattered to be considered for the “honor” until I read all the scam articles.

Check out this fellow blogger…
http://annoyedlibrarian.blogspot.com/2006/08/ala-sells-me-out-to-scam-artists.html

She says she thinks her association sold her name to this company, along with all the other members. I am not a member of anything really, nor am I that accomplished. So the only thing I can think of that would've given out my name is my mail-order prescription company.

Bastards.

No one is safe anymore. It's a sad sad world.


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I Suck at Fantasy Racing

Seriously. I think I need to just quit.

I am in my second year of the Florida Fantasy Auto Racing League, made up of various employees of racing organizations in the Daytona Beach Area, and other select VIP’s.

Last year, I did pretty well. I think I finished 5th overall at the end of the season or something like that. I definitely made the Chase, that’s for sure.

This year, though, there is something seriously wrong.

I can’t catch a break. I have been diligent, researching and picking new drivers every week. Which is an accomplishment in itself considering the grueling length of the NEXTEL Cup season.

But something is trying to keep me down. I’ll give you a little glimpse of how bad it is.

I am in LAST PLACE, holding steady for three weeks.

I am currently LOSING to two individuals who DROPPED OUT OF THE COMPETITION SEVERAL WEEKS AGO.
This means their drivers just cycle over, week after week. Apparently, they picked really consistent, winning drivers (i.e. Jeff Gordon), since they CONSISTANTLY BEAT ME EVERY WEEK, REGARDLESS OF HOW HARD I TRY.
Eventually, their drivers will tap out (after nine starts they become locked out of your roster) which gives me a small shred of hope.

I am convinced that there is some glitch in my yahoo account that gives me the preview & tips for the past week’s race. And shouldn’t there be some sort of display, large blinking icon, or loud alarm sound that indicates when it’s a Car of Tomorrow race?

That’s REALLY throwing me off.

So anyway, this is really discouraging to get the lowest score, week after week. Continually sucking in front of my professional peers is not something I enjoy doing.



Now I know how Michael Waltrip feels.


ZING!


…..

Scavengers

Today at work, I got to help Robbie’s department for a while (instead of sitting at my desk staring at the computer). DAYTONA USA had about 200 kids come in today, all in Jr. High, I think. They came in for a field trip, and basically what they do is split up into groups and rotate through the different parts of the attraction.

So this is when I realized I hate kids.

Not all kids, just those between the ages of 12-16.

My part of the festivities was the scavenger hunt. My job was to go and pick up a group of kids from their previous activity, and explain the scavenger hunt to them, release them into the attraction, and just be there to guide them, give them clues, or help them answer the questions.

It started out being a lot of fun. But then the whole thing just started falling apart. The first group of kids was great because they had just gotten there. They were interested in the activity, the chaperones were helpful, and I was really enjoying spending time with the Youth of America.

But as the day went on, the kids got more and more wound up, and more and more disrespectful. I am not sure at what point they decided to lose all respect for elders, but it made for an unpleasant experience with a select few of them. Plus, at this point, I was beginning to regret this morning’s shoe decision.

So as my feet began to swell, I walked through the attraction asking the kids if they needed help with any of the answers. Some of them were actually into it, and wanted to know where to FIND the answers. Some of the kids just wanted me to TELL them the answers, and when I didn’t they called me “bogus” or “whack” or whatever the kids are saying these days.

One group of about 5 kids was intently working on their scavenger hunt sheets in a group, and when I approached them & asked if they needed help, a rather unattractive girl replied, “No, we got the answer sheet.”

Oh. Ok. Wow. “Where did you get that?”

“My mom gave it to me. She’s one of the chaperones.”

Wow Mom. Way to encourage your kids to LEARN THINGS FOR THEMSELVES. And we wonder why the society is deteriorating. It starts with moronic parents like these.

So, long story short, my feet hurt, and I am tired and hungry and ready for five o’clock.

And I’ve decided that when I have kids, I will raise them until they’re about 11, send them to boarding school, and then retrieve them when they’ve become a mature, productive member of society.

I think that sounds like a plan.



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Smoke Update

It's getting worse. I can't see the Superstretch at ALL now.


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FL is Lovely this Time of Year

For those of you who think it would be just marvelous to live in Florida, here’s a little taste of what we’re experiencing right now.

This is what it looks like out my office window this morning.

And outside the building…

That’s right. You can’t SEE the Superstretch through the smoke. The photos don’t really do it justice. You can normally see every seat in the grandstands.

There are about 100 brush fires in the area, and the air is absolutely thick with smoke. I can smell it sitting here at my desk, and my window doesn’t even OPEN.

My allergies are letting me know too.

Here’s a photo across the street. You can’t even see the trees behind the shopping center. And they aren’t far away by any means.

Can people please stop throwing cigarette butts out the window?

I miss home.

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Pittsburgh PA

Robbie & I attended a wedding in Pittsburgh this weekend. The weather was beautiful, food was great, good times were had.

I met a lot of his family, and apparently I am a legend in the Pittsburgh area.

“SO THIS is Betsy!!! I’ve heard so much about you!!”

More to come. For now, here are some pictures.

My Neck is Red

Last night I did something that made me feel like a real Floridian.


I have a nice screened in patio on the back of my apartment, and I am on the second floor, so it’s a pretty nice view and nice breeze. Anyway, last night, Robbie was out on the porch talking on the phone, and when he ended his call, he yelled into the apartment,

“Hey, Come here. There’s a K-9 unit out in the woods across the street with flashlights. The dogs are sniffing something.”

So I proceeded to join him on the porch, and we watched the police officers and their dogs inspect the woods across the street from my apartment. We speculated all the different reasons that the cops were there. Drugs? Dead homeless guy? Fugitive?

At one point, none of the officers or dogs were visible, and we were just sitting there looking at their parked police vehicle for a span of about 4 minutes.

Ah Rednecks.

Me an ol’ Robbie sittin’ on the porch watchin’ the cops in the woods across the road.




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