The Evolution of the Boy Band

After a recent post about the much-anticipated reunion of New Kids on the Block, I became curious...

Where did this "boy band" phenomenon begin?

Why is the idea so TIMELESS?

Why do they always wear such ridiculous outfits?

So let's look back, shall we?

1950's

Frankie Lymon and the Teenagers

hmm.. matching sweaters... isn't that swell

1960's

The Monkees

Tossle caps, turtle necks and Davey Jones... an American girl's dream

(although I can't tell which one's "the ugly one")

1970's

Bay City Rollers

I don't think this photo requires an explanation.

1980's

New Kids on the Block

Once again... the hair. Also featuring plastic jackets, career-mom haircuts, the "ugly one" and the "bad boy."

1990's

*NSYNC

Couldn't resist the urge to pile on top of each other in photo shoots.

Bless their hearts.

2000's

The Jonas Brothers

Wait a minute... these people can actually PLAY instruments?

Or is that just a prop?

I gotta tell ya, we haven't come very far. They all still look like a bunch of sissies.

In conclusion, I have found that the formula for a successful boy band is very simple:


1. Start with some average-looking boys (using the term "boys" loosely, i.e. One of the members of NSYNC was like, thirty when they started out).

2. Manipulate each member's personality, style and language to fit an easily-identifiable stereotype (i.e. The Bad Boy, The Ugly One, The Innocent One, The Crazy One, The Quiet One, The Lover, etc...)

3. Add some colorful clothing that threatens to cross the line over to the ridiculous side, but is just fashionable enough to get away with.

4. Sprinkle in some stupid haircuts.

5. Manufacture some lame songs about "Girl please don't leave me," "did it hurt when you fell from heaven?" and "It's time to party, ya'll"

...and VOILA!

You've got yourself a money-making machine!


Who's YOUR favorite?

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